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A learning experience is one of those things that says, 'You know that thing you just did? Don't do that.

To summarize the summary of the summary: people are a problem.

My capacity for happiness," he added, "you could fit into a matchbox without taking out the matches first

I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be.

Life... is like a grapefruit. Well, it's sort of orangey-yellow and dimpled on the outside, wet and squidgy in the middle. It's got pips inside, too. Oh, and some people have half a one for breakfast.

The fact that we live at the bottom of a deep gravity well, on the surface of a gas covered planet going around a nuclear fireball 90 million miles away and think this to be normal is obviously some indication of how skewed our perspective tends to be.

We are stuck with technology when what we really want is just stuff that works.

I love deadlines. I love the whooshing noise they make as they go by.

If I ever meet myself,' said Zaphod, 'I'll hit myself so hard I won't know what's hit me.

I think fish is nice, but then I think that rain is wet, so who am I to judge?

The Guide says there is an art to flying", said Ford, "or rather a knack. The knack lies in learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

We demand rigidly defined areas of doubt and uncertainty!

All opinions are not equal. Some are a very great deal more robust, sophisticated and well supported in logic and argument than others.

The Hitch-Hiker's Guide to the Galaxy also mentions alcohol. It says that the best drink in existence is the Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster, the effect of which is like having your brains smashed out with a slice of lemon wrapped round a large gold brick.

One of the things Ford Prefect had always found hardest to understand about humans was their habit of continually stating and repeating the very very obvious.

He hoped and prayed that there wasn't an afterlife. Then he realized there was a contradiction involved here and merely hoped that there wasn't an afterlife.

Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so.

I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that I don't know the answer