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David Sedaris is an American humorist, essayist, and author. He is known for his sardonic wit and incisive social commentary, which have been featured in his best-selling books, essays, and radio broadcasts.

Sedaris was born in Johnson City, New York, in 1956. He grew up in Raleigh, North Carolina, and graduated from the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. After college, he moved to New York City, where he worked as a writer and performer.

Sedaris's first book, Barrel Fever, was published in 1994. He has since published nine more books, including Naked, Me Talk Pretty One Day, Dress Your Family in Corduroy and Denim, and When You Are Engulfed in Flames. His essays have been featured in The New Yorker, Harper's, and The Paris Review.

Sedaris is also a regular contributor to National Public Radio, where he has read his essays for many years. He has won numerous awards for his writing, including the Thurber Prize for American Humor and the Grammy Award for Best Spoken Word Album.

Sedaris is a popular and critically acclaimed writer who has made a significant contribution to American humor. His work is funny, insightful, and thought-provoking, and it has resonated with readers of all ages.

At the end of a miserable day, instead of grieving my virtual nothing, I can always look at my loaded wastepaper basket and tell myself that if I failed, at least I took a few trees down with me.

David Sedaris

Everyone looks retarded once you set your mind to it.

David Sedaris

All I do is lie, and that has made me immune to compliments.

David Sedaris

Like all of my friends, she's a lousy judge of character.

David Sedaris

A good [short story] would take me out of myself and then stuff me back in, outsized, now, and uneasy with the fit.

David Sedaris

If you aren't cute, you may as well be clever.

David Sedaris

We were not a hugging people. In terms of emotional comfort it was our belief that no amount of physical contact could match the healing powers of a well made cocktail.

David Sedaris

Sometimes the sins you haven't committed are all you have left to hold onto.

David Sedaris

I'm the most important person in the lives of almost everyone I know and a good number of the people I've never even met.

David Sedaris

Speed eliminates all doubt. Am I smart enough? Will people like me? Do I really look all right in this plastic jumpsuit?

David Sedaris

I hate you' she said to me one afternoon. 'I really, really hate you.' Call me sensitive, but I couldn't help but take it personally.

David Sedaris

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