Explore Popular Quotes by Mark Twain

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75 Quotes and sayings

Mark Twain was an American author, humorist, entrepreneur, publisher, and lecturer.
* He was born Samuel Langhorne Clemens on November 30, 1835, in Florida, Missouri.
* He is best known for his novels The Adventures of Tom Sawyer and Adventures of Huckleberry Finn.
* Twain's work has been praised for its humor, satire, and realism.
* He was a vocal critic of racism and social injustice.
* Twain died on April 21, 1910, in Redding, Connecticut.
* He is considered one of the greatest American writers of all time.
* His work continues to be read and enjoyed by people all over the world.

Don't say the old lady screamed. Bring her on and let her scream.

Mark Twain

A successful book is not made of what is in it, but what is left out of it.

Mark Twain

What is Man? Man is a noisome bacillus whom Our Heavenly Father created because he was disappointed in the monkey.

Mark Twain

I take my only exercise acting as a pallbearer at the funerals of my friends who exercise regularly.

Mark Twain

April 1. This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three hundred and sixty-four.

Mark Twain

When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.

Mark Twain

The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.

Mark Twain

Kindness is a language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.

Mark Twain

I notice that you use plain, simple language, short words and brief sentences. That is the way to write English

Mark Twain

 inspirational quotes - Image for quote : Education: the path from cocky ignorance to miserable uncertainty.

Education: the path from cocky ignorance to miserable uncertainty.

Mark Twain

When red-headed people are above a certain social grade their hair is auburn.

Mark Twain

A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.

Mark Twain

The lack of money is the root of all evil.

Mark Twain

Adam was but human—this explains it all. He did not want the apple for the apple's sake, he wanted it only because it was forbidden. The mistake was in not forbidding the serpent; then he would have eaten the serpent.

Mark Twain

Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.

Mark Twain

Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.

Mark Twain

The difference between the almost right word and the right word is really a large matter. ’tis the difference between the lightning bug and the lightning.

Mark Twain

Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.

Mark Twain

Humor is mankind's greatest blessing.

Mark Twain

Obscurity and a competence—that is the life that is best worth living.

Mark Twain

It usually takes me two or three days to prepare an impromptu speech.

Mark Twain

In Paris they just simply opened their eyes and stared when we spoke to them in French! We never did succeed in making those idiots understand their own language.

Mark Twain

I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

Mark Twain

Sanity and happiness are an impossible combination.

Mark Twain

Often it does seem such a pity that Noah and his party did not miss the boat.

Mark Twain

A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.

Mark Twain

There are those who scoff at the schoolboy, calling him frivolous andshallow: Yet it was the schoolboy who said 'Faith is believing what youknow ain't so'.

Mark Twain

Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.

Mark Twain

When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.

Mark Twain

When I am king they shall not have bread and shelter only, but also teachings out of books, for a full belly is little worth where the mind is starved.

Mark Twain

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