Lemony Snicket

There are many, many types of books in the world, which makes good sense, because there are many, many types of people, and everybody wants to read something different.

Those unable to catalog the past are doomed to repeat it.

I suppose I'll have to add the force of gravity to my list of enemies.

Strange as it may seem, I still hope for the best, even though the best, like an interesting piece of mail, so rarely arrives, and even when it does it can be lost so easily.

Sometimes, just saying that you hate something, and having someone agree with you, can make you feel better about a terrible situation.

I am heartbroken, but I have been heartbroken before, and this might be the best for which I can hope.

Friends can make you feel that the world is smaller and less sneaky than it really is, because you know people who have similar experiences.

This is my knife. It is very sharp and very eager to hurt you.

Siblings that say they never fight are most definitely hiding something

For Beatrice, when we first met, I was lonely, and you were pretty.Now I am pretty lonely.

If you are a student you should always get a good nights sleep unless you have come to the good part of your book, and then you should stay up all night and let your schoolwork fall by the wayside, a phrase which means 'flunk'.

Fate is like a strange, unpopular restaurant filled with odd little waiters who bring you things you never asked for and don't always like.

Just because you don't understand it doesn't mean it isn't so.

There is nothing particularly wrong with salmon, of course, but like caramel candy, strawberry yogurt, or liquid carpet cleaner, if you eat too much of it you are not going to enjoy your meal.