Jim Butcher Welcome to our collection of popular quotes by

I sometimes give myself excellent advice. Occasionally, I even listen to it.

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• Funny

Son. Everyone dies alone. That's what it is. It's a door. It's one person wide. When you go through it, you do it alone. But it doesn't mean you've got to be alone before you go through the door. And believe me, you aren't alone on the other side.

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• Life

You rush a miracle worker, you get lousy miracles!

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• Humor

A succubus on the set. Strike that, the health-conscious kid sister made it two… succubuses. Succubusees? Succubi? Stupid Latin correspondence course.

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• Humor

Kids. You gotta love them. I adore children. A little salt, a squeeze of lemon--perfect.

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• Humor

Life is a journey. Time is a river. The door is ajar

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• Life

I let out a battle cry. Sure, a lot of people might have mistaken it for a sudden yelp of unmanly fear, but trust me. It was a battle cry.

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• Humor

But the only way never to do the wrong thing is never to do anything.

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• Life

It came charging toward me, several hundred pounds of angry-looking monster, and I did the only thing any reasonable wizard could have done.I turned around and ran like hell.

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• Humor

I died. I died and someone made a clerical error and I am in Heaven.

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• Humor

We have now left Reason and Sanity Junction. Next stop, Looneyville.

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• Humor

I'm amazing and studly, but I have limits.

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• Humor

Don't call me a dinosaur. It isn't fair to the dinosaurs. What did a dinosaur ever do to you?

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• Humor

I'm dealing with a lot of scary things. I think you have to react to them. And you either laugh at them or you go insane.

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• Life

If I was on the road to Hell, at least I was going in style.

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• Humor

Put some clothes on, you weird, yellow-eyed, table-dancing, werewolf-training, cryptic, stare-me-right-in-the-eyes-and-don't-even-blink wench.

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• Humor

Are you always a smartass?'Nope. Sometimes I'm asleep.

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• Humor

Knowledge is the ultimate weapon. It always has been.

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• Knowledge

Many things are not as they seem: The worst things in life never are.

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• Life

Life would be unbearably dull if we had answers to all our questions.

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• Life

In the name of the Pizza Lord. Charge!

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• Motivational

Heroism doesn't pay very well. I try to be cold-blooded and money-oriented, but I keep screwing it up.

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• Humor

I don't know about your true form, but the weight of your ego sure is pushing the crust of the earth toward the breaking point.

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• Humor

Likest thou jelly within thy doughnut?

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• Humor

You know how confusing the whole good-evil concept is for me.

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• Humor

Laughter is good for you. Nine out of ten stand-up comedians recommend laughter in the face of intense stupidity.

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• Humor

Home is where, when you go there and tell people to get out, they have to leave.

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• Humor

So. You get handed a holy sword by an archangel, told to go fight the forces of evil, and you somehow remain an atheist. Is that what you're saying?

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• Humor

I’ve had a tense couple of days. And I’ve got to tell you, burning someone’s face off sounds like a great way to relax.

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• Humor