Quotes and sayings about tag  funny

Fifteen men on the Dead Man's Chest Yo-ho-ho, and a bottle of rum! Drink and the devil had done for the rest Yo-ho-ho, and a bottle of rum!

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I came from a real tough neighborhood. Once a guy pulled a knife on me. I knew he wasn't a professional, the knife had butter on it.

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Once I pulled a job, I was so stupid. I picked a guy's pocket on an airplane and made a run for it.

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If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the up button.

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My congratulations to you, sir. Your manuscript is both good and original; but the part that is good is not original, and the part that is original is not good.

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If we're mad, we're mad in large numbers, at least larger than yours.

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La cucaracha, La cucaracha, Ya no puede caminar, porque no tiene, porque le falta, I don't know the rest, la la la la!

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On Friday night, I was reading my new book, but my brain got tired, so I decided to watch some television instead.

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The downside of my celebrity is that I cannot go anywhere in the world without being recognized. It is not enough for me to wear dark sunglasses and a wig. The wheelchair gives me away.

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Yes, because a vampire slumber party is the pinnacle of safety conscious behavior.

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Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you do criticize him, you'll be a mile away and have his shoes.

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Hitler: Thank you, whoever you are. I think you just saved my life.The Doctor: Believe me... It was an accident.

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If at first you don't succeed then skydiving definitely isn't for you.

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I guess we're oil and water. (Phoebe)I'd say we're more like gasoline and a blowtorch. (Dan)

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This is America. We’re entitled to our opinions.Wrong. This is Texas. And my opinion is the only one that counts.

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