Jasper Fforde Welcome to our collection of popular quotes by

Books may look like nothing more than words on a page, but they are actually an infinitely complex imaginotransference technology that translates odd, inky squiggles into pictures inside your head.

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• Books

Two minds with but a single thought, two hearts that beat as one.

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• Love

Okay, this is the wisdom. First, time spent on reconnaissanse is never wasted. Second, almost anything can be improved with the addition of bacon. And finally, there is no problem on Earth that can't be ameliorated by a hot bath and a cup of tea.

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• Wisdom

Whereas story is processed in the mind in a straightforward manner, poetry bypasses rational thought and goes straight to the limbic system and lights it up like a brushfire. It's the crack cocaine of the literary world.

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• Humor

Take no heed of her.... She reads a lot of books.

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• Books

Don't ever call me mad, Mycroft. I'm not mad. I'm just ... well, differently moraled, that's all.

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• Humor

Governments and fashions come and go but Jane Eyre is for all time.

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• Books

If the real world were a book, it would never find a publisher. Overlong, detailed to the point of distraction-and ultimately, without a major resolution.

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• Life

Mr. McGregor's a nasty piece of work, isn't he? Quite the Darth Vader of children's literature.

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• Humor

If it weren't for greed, intolerance, hate, passion and murder, you would have no works of art, no great buildings, no medical science, no Mozart, no Van Gough, no Muppets and no Louis Armstrong.

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• Humor

I would so hate to be a first-person character! Always on your guard, always having people read your thoughts!

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• Humor

Dead. Never been that before. Not even once.

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• Humor

Her majesty is one verb short of a sentence.

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• Humor