Quotes on “funny”

Do things that make you happy within the confines of the legal system.

Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see with the naked eye unless you have been drinking.

Now it was just the three of us: the leader, the warrior, and the kid about to wet his pants. Guess who I was.

A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.

I never hated a man enough to give him his diamonds back.

To ugly ducklings everywhere,Don't worry about those fluffy yellow morons:They'll never get to be swans

Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours.

[Thine] face is not worth sunburning.

How art thou out of breath when thou hast breathTo say to me that thou art out of breath?

[Thou] mad mustachio purple-hued maltworms!

Inconceivable! You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that's an alibi for my ignorance.

Everything is funny as long as it is happening to somebody else.

Do you ever think if people heard our conversations they'd lock us up? All the time.

Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use.

Now listen, we need to be quiet as mice. No, quieter than that. As quiet as . . . as . . . Dead mice? Reynie suggested. Perfect, said Kate with an approving nod. As quiet as dead mice.

Instead of committing suicide, people go to work.

He stared at her neck. Realization pulsed. He was looking at the bite he had given her. A hard length was growing against her hip. So, is that your long, scaly, reptilian tail, or are you just happy to see me? No, she did not just say that. Did she?