Quotes and sayings about tag  humor

She'd absolutely adored the library_an entire building where anyone could take things they didn't own and feel no remorse about it.

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• Humor

Humor can get in under the door while seriousness is still fumbling at the handle.

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• Humor

But there is in everything a reasonable division of labour. I have written the book, and nothing on earth would induce me to read it.

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• Humor

I am not absentminded. It is the presence of mind that makes me unaware of everything else.

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• Humor

Scriptures, n. The sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane writings on which all other faiths are based.

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• Humor

Selfish, adj. Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others.

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• Humor

Pray, v. To ask that the laws of the universe be annulled in behalf of a single petitioner, confessedly unworthy.

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• Humor

Quotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.

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• Humor

I'm very polite by nature, even the voices in my head let each other finish their sentences.

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• Humor

I'm looking into my past lives. I'm convinced some of them still owe me money.

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• Humor

Faith may be defined briefly as an illogical belief in the occurrence of the improbable.

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• Humor

Sweater, n. Garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.

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• Humor

An artist is somebody who produces things that people don't need to have.

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• Humor

If ruining the only religious icon I have leaves me vulnerable to Martian vampires, I'll have to risk it.

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• Humor

Who wants to go down the creepy tunnel inside the tomb first?— Riley Poole

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• Humor

The older I grow, the more I distrust the familiar doctrine that age brings wisdom.

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• Humor

Truth would quickly cease to be stranger than fiction, once we got as used to it.

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• Humor

Down with tyranny!' Bramble cried. 'Aristocracy! Autocracy! Monocracy! Other ocracy things! You are outnumbered, sir! Surrender!

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• Humor

People who entered the Courtyard without an invitation were just plain crazy! Wolves were big and scary and so fluffy, how could anyone resist hugging one just to feel all that fur?Ignore the fluffy, she muttered. Remember the part about big and scary.

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• Humor

When I get sad, I stop being sad and be awesome instead.

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• Inspirational

You don't happen to have a thousand dollars I can borrow? I don't have five you can borrow. My piggy bank is officialy anorexic.

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• Humor

If you would not be forgotten, as soon as you are dead and rotten, either write things worth reading, or do things worth writing.

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• Inspirational

I hate patience. Slows everything down.

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• Humor

In a totally sane society, madness is the only freedom.

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• Humor

I was talking aloud to myself. A habit of the old: they choose the wisest person present to speak to

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• Humor

There are two motives for reading a book; one, that you enjoy it; the other, that you can boast about it.

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• Humor

I believe that there is an equality to all humanity. We all suck.

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• Humor

The world isn't fair, Calvin. I know Dad, but why isn't it ever unfair in my favor?

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• Humor

I've got to start listening to those quiet, nagging doubts.

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• Humor

If you reject the food, ignore the customs, fear the religion, and avoid the people, you might better stay home.

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• Humor