100+ Funny Quotes & Sayings

Now listen, we need to be quiet as mice. No, quieter than that. As quiet as . . . as . . . Dead mice? Reynie suggested. Perfect, said Kate with an approving nod. As quiet as dead mice.

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Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use.

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[Thou] mad mustachio purple-hued maltworms!

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How art thou out of breath when thou hast breathTo say to me that thou art out of breath?

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[Thine] face is not worth sunburning.

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Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours.

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To ugly ducklings everywhere,Don't worry about those fluffy yellow morons:They'll never get to be swans

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