Quotes on “humor”

I'll not listen to reason... reason always means what someone else has got to say.

Far be it from me to keep a woman from her book. That could become dangerous.

Once I had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalogue: No good in a bed, but fine up against a wall.

I have noticed that the people who are late are often so much jollier than the people who have to wait for them.

A great nose may be an indexOf a great soul

Genius is of small use to a woman who does not know how to do her hair.

I have a terrible memory; I never forget a thing.

Invisible things are the only realities.

I have great faith in fools - self-confidence my friends will call it.

Mysteries force a man to think, and so injure his health.

They say that 'Guns don't kill people, people kill people.' Well I think the gun helps. If you just stood there and yelled BANG, I don't think you'd kill too many people.

She craved a tall glass of the fresh-squeezed lemonade from the pitcher she’d left chilling in the fridge. Two glasses served with a generous slice of pound cake with orange glaze icing sounded twice as nice.

Trust me, Wilbur. People are very gullible. They'll believe anything they see in print.

If the world were merely seductive, that would be easy. If it were merely challenging, that would be no problem. But I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day.

Weirdism is definitely the cornerstone of many an artist's career.

I am an artist you know ... it is my right to be odd.

There is nothing more luxurious than eating while you read—unless it be reading while you eat. Amabel did both: they are not the same thing, as you will see if you think the matter over.

An alcoholic is someone you don't like, who drinks as much as you do.