Quotes on “humor”

Why are they going to disappear him?'I don't know.'It doesn't make sense. It isn't even good grammar.

Men are all the same, they think that because they came out of the belly of a woman they know all there is to know about women.

I will describe my eyes and then begin the story. My eyes are blue and resplendent. Now I will begin the story.

By the way, when you finish the bottle of Crown Royal, you can still use the pouch to hold your broken dreams.

Yes, reason has been a part of organized religion, ever since two nudists took dietary advice from a talking snake.

You have to remember one thing about the will of the people: it wasn't that long ago that we were swept away by the Macarena.

I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.

Your brain is doing some great work when it's laughing.

Falling in love is painful on the knees.

Everything here is edible; even I'm edible. But that, dear children, is cannibalism, and is in fact frowned upon in most societies.

A dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest.

I try to stay in a constant state of confusion just because of the expression it leaves on my face.

The true New Yorker secretly believes that people living anywhere else have to be, in some sense, kidding.

The long run is a misleading guide to current affairs. In the long run we are all dead.

If you think your boss is stupid, remember: you wouldn’t have a job if he was any smarter.

We are like chameleons, we take our hue and the color of our moral character, from those who are around us.

In this dirty minded world, you are either someone's wife or someone's whore. And if you're not either people think there is something wrong with you....but there is nothing wrong with me

In the world according to Garp, we are all terminal cases