Quotes on “humor”

Books can also provoke emotions. And emotions sometimes are even more troublesome than ideas. Emotions have led people to do all sorts of things they later regret-like, oh, throwing a book at someone else.

A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.

Housework won't kill you, but then again, why take the chance?

If a cricketer, for instance, suddenly decided to go into a school and batter a lot of people to death with a cricket bat, which he could do very easily, I mean, are you going to ban cricket bats?

This is a mournful discovery.1)Those who agree with you are insane2)Those who do not agree with you are in power.

If you think this Universe is bad, you should see some of the others.

I've been embarrassing myself since about birth.

The magician stood erect, menacing the attackers with demons, metamorphoses, paralyzing ailments, and secret judo holds. Molly picked up a rock.

Cats don't need to be possessed; they're evil on their own.

I love being a writer. What I can't stand is the paperwork.

I felt this awful obligation to be charming or at least have something to say, and the pressure of having to be charming (or merely verbal) incapacitates me.

Sometimes when it looks like I'm deep in thought I'm just trying not to have a conversation with people.

Do you know the difference between education and experience? Education is when you read the fine print; experience is what you get when you don't.

Life makes fools of all of us sooner or later. But keep your sense of humor and you'll at least be able to take your humiliations with some measure of grace. In the end, you know, its our own expectations that crush us.

I used to think anyone doing anything weird was weird. Now I know that it is the people that call others weird that are weird.

Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away.

Half of seeming clever is keeping your mouth shut at the right times.

... for most practical purposes, Tarbean had two parts: Waterside and Hillside. Waterside is where people are poor. That makes them beggars, thieves and whores. Hillside is where people are rich. That makes them solicitors, politicians and courtesans.