Quotes and sayings about tag  humor

1,286 Quotes

Have you noticed that whatever sport you're trying to learn, some earnest person is always telling you to keep your knees bent?

Dave Barry

The problem with winter sports is that -- follow me closely here -- they generally take place in winter.

Dave Barry

Forget men, I want to marry my MacBook. It’s dependable, reliable and you can even go shopping with it.

Alexandra Potter

We're not retreating, we're advancing in reverse.' --Skulduggery Pleasant

Derek Landy

The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder.

Alfred Hitchcock

It's not that I want you to go, it's just that I don't want you to stay.

Derek Landy

I think it's kinda nice.' And I did. my mom isn't famous for her pies. No, she's famous for defusing a nuclear device in Brussels with only a pair of cuticle scissors and a ponytail holder. Somehow, at the moment, pies seemed cooler.

Ally Carter

Don't look at me in that tone of voice.

Dorothy Parker

You don't need a search warrant to go through someone's trash. Seriously. Once it hits the curb it is totally fair game-you an look it up.

Ally Carter

Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.

Dorothy Parker

She'd absolutely adored the library_an entire building where anyone could take things they didn't own and feel no remorse about it.

Ally Carter

Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone.

Dorothy Parker

Scriptures, n. The sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane writings on which all other faiths are based.

Ambrose Bierce

I meant what I said and I said what I meant. An elephant's faithful one-hundred percent!

Dr. Seuss

Selfish, adj. Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others.

Ambrose Bierce

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