Quotes on “humour”

If it weren’t for physics and law enforcement, I’d be unstoppable.

Never knock on death's door. Ring the doorbell then run. He totally hates that. - T-shirt

At first, I could lie about my lack of sleep and she'd fall for it, but she started suspecting insomnia when I began seeing purple elephants in the air vents at the office. I knew I shouldn't have asked her about them. I thought maybe she'd redecorated.